I’m in Orlando now for RubyConf. When I am on a trip, I have apparently developed a habit of waking up after only a couple hours sleep and not being able to go back to bed. So, since I’m awake, I figured I’d write a blog post.

The creator of Ruby, Matz, gave a keynote this morning to open the conference. He talked about how love is the driving force behind Ruby. It’s his love of programming languages that drove him to design Ruby and the love of the Ruby community that has kept it going. Other Japanese speakers gave talks, too, and they were very passionate. It’s obvious that they care a great deal for what Ruby has become. It’s hard not to be touched by it.

Having been in the Ruby community for 3 years or so now, I’ve discovered some things about the kind of people who use Ruby. It seems like several of the people who are big names in the community are somewhat insecure. They need to be in the spotlight. Sometimes, they’re also assholes. There are very cool Ruby developers, too, but to be well-known, it seems like you have to be something of an ass. (more…)

So after months and months, Matt’s wedding was finally this weekend. I took off work Friday in order to make the drive to Arkansas for the rehearsal. I made it with plenty of time, and we played frisbee beforehand. The rehearsal itself was a bit rough for me, as there was a lot of conversation in various groups during the downtime. Thankfully, I had my iPod and a book.

After the rehearsal, we had dinner. It was an emotional experience. Matt’s brother-in-law gave the toast, telling the story of how Matt and Cat started dating. Cat’s sister, Kara, also told her bit. Then it snowballed a bit to everyone opening up about their feelings towards Matt and Cat. It was a very powerful time. (more…)

So I’m back now from spending new year’s with the Singleton family. It was a lot of fun. There’s so much love in that family; it’s pretty amazing. Everyone is close, and their family is prospering. Aaron’s and Betsy’s daughter is getting older and more adventurous, and there’s every sign that their family will continue growing in awesome ways.

They welcome me with open arms whenever I come to visit. That means a great deal to me. I care for them all a lot.

Sometimes when things seem to be going perfectly, I tend to look for imperfections. In my past, things that seemed “perfect” weren’t really perfect at all. In fact, there was merely a thin veneer of goodness over a painful and coarse truth. So I try to look for problems so that I know that something really is what it appears to be. It’s a cynical way to live, and I’m not as trusting as maybe I should be.

The truth is that the Singletons have had their share of problems. Some of them very serious. But the fact that they’ve overcome them and grown from them shows how strong their family really is.

The problem with suspecting hidden turmoil all the time is the potential to subconsciously desire for things to go awry. It’s a bad way to live. I hope that I grow out of it someday.

Tomorrow we’re driving back home. I’ve had a lot of fun, but I’m ready to go back. After this it’ll be business as usual for a while, since I think the next official holiday for me isn’t until May. I’m sure a lot will have happened by then, especially if things keep going like they have recently.

I told Stuffy a few weeks ago that it’s just been one thing after another for what seems like a long time. He said that’s how it’s always been. I didn’t really want to believe that, because I wanted to be able to look forward to a lull in the drama. But as long as I continue to have friends and meet people and try to keep growing, which will happen as long as I live if I’m lucky, there will always be one thing after another. That’s life, I guess. The sooner I accept that and start approaching that fact in a positive way, the better. I suppose. Heh.

Well I finally get to sleep on a couch for the first time this trip, so I’m gonna get to that right away. Night.

Living with roommates creates its own sets of challenges. One person cleans something, only for it to be dirtied up again by someone else. Someone watches the TV or plays video games when someone else wants to use it for something else. The list goes on.

What are the pros? Cheaper rent and utilities. More people around to keep you company. Someone to talk to.

I think the cons are starting to outweigh the pros for me. I’m starting to want privacy a lot more often. Little things have been bothering me, too. Sometimes I feel like I’ve been a bit used; my roommates get a lot more use out of some of my belongings than I do. Not to say that they don’t get annoyed with me sometimes, too, because I’m sure they do.

I have a good job, and I’m single. I can afford my own apartment. Moving out on my own also has its own set of problems, but what scenario wouldn’t? The question is whether or not those problems are worth dealing with. The biggest fear I’ve always had about it is feeling alone.

It would be nice though to come home to a place after work everyday where nothing has moved or changed since I left it. Drinks or food I put in the fridge would still be there when I got back. I could leave laundry in the dryer without worrying about someone moving my clothes. I could have a furry little cat named “Beer” that would be happy to see me whenever I walked in the door.

Tomorrow I’m road tripping with Matt and Catherine, who are recently engaged. Natalie was gonna go, too, but she backed out. I’m a little concerned about feeling out of place with the two lovebirds, but not too concerned. They’re both my friends, after all, and I’m fond of everyone that will be at our destination. I have a contingency plan at the ready just in case they start getting all lovey-dovey without me. (Namely a book and some headphones.)